Evolving Sweetie

The Giving of Thanks

Throughout my conversations this week a wonderful thing has emerged. Over and over with talking to friends, coworkers, clients and even random strangers most adults have confessed that Thanksgiving is their favorite holiday. And the sentiment was pretty consistent. We are all thankful for a lovely meal celebrating with our family and friends. Gratitude, good food and wonderful company. What could be better.

My inner foodie loves the extravagance. I love that everyone has their speciality dish. And the pride with which they tell it to you. 

Today is a gentle reminder to give thanks for the bounty and blessings in our lives. If there is one gift I could give everyone I love it's gratitude. Life is so much sweeter when we notice all the little things we are gifted with each day. Found that when I am consciously keeping a gratitude journal I'm so much happier and healthier. 

Today and everyday I am thankful for my family - Mom & Dad, Heather & Mike, my lovely nieces and all my extended relatives. We are a clan filled with lots of love and heart. 

Thankful to Chuck for loving me with his all. My soul aches extra for you today!

Thanks to my best friend Janie, friend family and friends. You are the family I choose. Thank you for your companionship, loyalty, laughter and compassion. 

Thankful to my coworkers and job. With the state of affairs we are going through these days, I'm so grateful for my job. 

Most of all I am thankful that everyone I care about has a roof over their heads, healthy food on the table and love surrounding them. 

Happy thanksgiving everyone!!!

The Muppets - Bohemian Rhapsody

This video has been making the rounds on Facebook the last few days. It's the funniest thing I've seen in awhile. 

 Made my day! Needed a dose of Animal and the Swedish Chef. Enjoy!

Seven Years

Today...

Seven years ago, marked my last first date.

Seven years ago, dinner in a little french bistro changed the course of our lives.

Seven years ago, our remarkable love story began.

Seven years ago, soul mates collided.

Dearest Chuck ~ 

Happy Anniversary of our first date my love. I'm forever grateful for the gift of you as my husband, lover, best-friend and companion. You were the one who recognized my soul. You are my hero. Your love shaped me into the woman I am today - strong, loved beyond measure, tested, peaceful, secure, compassionate and a survivor. My life with you allowed the best in me to shine through even in our darkest hours. Wherever you are, my heart and soul travel alongside you. Miss you more than words could hope to express honey. 

I love you through eternity.

Your Sweetie  ~ Jeannette

Peace

And now for a moment of Zen

 

Happy friday!

Forty One

Today the calendar turns and officially 41 starts. I love my birthday. And I'm not shy about letting that be known or setting up plans for celebration. Hey, if you aren't going to get excited about your birthday then who is.

After being in a seminar all weekend I figured I'd be exhausted today so I took today as a vacation day to just be. The celebrations started last night with dinner at Crush with Mike & Heather. I love dinner celebrations with my sister and BIL. Wonderful to have some one-on-two adult time and enjoy fabulous food & wine. Been wanting to try Crush for a long time. We all did the pre-fix chef special menu paired with wine. Very lovely. A flavorful take on the apple/hazelnut/blue cheese salad. I wouldn't have thought to pair with a Riesling, but it so worked. And the fish and short beef rib courses were magnificent. Dessert was a deconstructed lemon meyer cheesecake, grapefruit with shaved ginger and a brand new taste to us all Douglas Fir sorbet over a ginger cookie. It was surprising and very refreshing. My inner foodie was singing all the way home.

This morning I'm hoping to find a massage. I'll spend some quality time with my sister this afternoon and get in my fix for hugs from my lovely nieces! Tonight I'm meeting my friend family for neapolitan style pizza at Pizzeria Fondi in the neighborhood. Good company and fun. That is the order for today.

As part of my birthday rituals I reflect on the previous year and set my intentions for the upcoming one. It's funny, always had this belief that even years were my better years. However my 36th year with Chuck getting sick and my 38th year with becoming a widow shattered that illusion. Now - I just look forward to another fresh start. While progress is being made on both of these goals - taking good care of myself and getting back in the dating game are where my energies will be focused this coming year. A healthy fulfilling life and a partner to share it with are my birthday wishes. Time to do more work to make them come true.

Little Earthquakes

What a week it's been. Lots of medical procedures happening and being planned throughout my family and friends. Happily, I can report that the emergency for my friends C & B turned out to be the best of all possible scenarios and life should return to normal for them soon. And C's Dad's prognosis is good. I'm overflowing with gratitude for my friends and their families.

On top of my emotions, prayers and worry for my friends, I was catapulted right back into the grief, confusion and sorrow of Chuck's initial diagnosis and treatments. Stunned after all that I've survived and rebuilt just how raw and shallow below the surface all of those experiences and emotions lie. The ground shifted and down I tumbled into that dark and scary crevice. Another reminder that there is no healing from some experiences, we just learn to live beyond them.

During my travels this week I spent a lot of time with Tori Amos listening to her beautiful prose and music. Her emotional delivery is a touchstone for me in hard times. Once again, she refused to fail me. Little Earthquakes shook me to the core. And helped me belt through the sorrow and pain over and over until the ground seamed itself back together. 

We danced in graveyards with vampires till dawn

We laughed in the faces of kings never offering to burn

And I hate disintegration

Watching us wither

Black winged roses that safely change their colors

Oh - these little earthquakes

Here we go again

Oh - these little earthquakes

doesn't take much to rip us into pieces

I can't reach you

Give me life

Give me pain

Give me myself again

The Beast

No one expects to get rear-ended while moving. It's not part of our cautionary engrained patterns. A little VW bug took on the business end of my Blazer on Wednesday night. I didn't see it coming as I was glancing to the left to check for availability to change lanes. A crash is never a welcoming sound. Especially when it involves the jolt of being party to it.

We pulled along side the road in the pitch black to survey the damage. What a way for strangers to meet. She was tumbling over apologies and inquiries to my state of being. And I worried about her health for judging by the state of our cars - she bore the majority of the impact. Story was simple. Drink slips from hand spilling, rolling under foot and in the ensuing distraction not enough braking time.

It's no secret that I'm not in love with my car that we've dubbed "The Beast". It's a big white elephant of a truck. It's not stylish, comfortable, economical or subtle. But surveying the accordion that once was a hood, the crunched radiator oozing shiny black on the pavement and the busted headlights like a black eye on the little bug, I was grateful. For my brute of a car did exactly what Chuck wanted it for, it kept his family safe.

Upon glancing at my car you can't tell it was in an accident. The adjustor said that my bummers are built really solid. As a bumper should be in my humble opinion. But The Beast escaped with only $350 of damage and I only suffered some muscle soreness for a few days. 

Pretty miraculous for a scary bump in the night.

Fall at the Japanese Garden

Finally the sun cooperated and gave us a lovely fall weekend. Strolled through the Japanese Garden on Saturday in hopes of capturing some fall colors. 

POSTCARDS from the Japanese Garden, Seattle WA