Survived my first week back into the working world. As with all new jobs, there are adjustments and ropes to learn. The company is small. Everyone seems to be really nice, quirky and dedicated. Should fit right in soon. All in all I'd give the week an A-.
Surprised how gut-level happy I was to be back into a routine and productive. A true worker-bee by nature. And extremely thankful in this economy to be back to work.
There was a side-effect to working that I was blind-sided with last evening. The transition from the work week to my time that happens on Friday nights. Since Chuck has been gone, it's been one of my struggle points. No matter what happened the rest of the week, friday night dinner was always our reconnection ritual. Whether we ate out or brought food home, it marked the survival of another week and the re-entry point to our time. After 6 months of being out of the work-force with each day blending into the next, this transition didn't exist.
How unexpected it was last night to have that familiar panic return. The urgent need to call friends with futility to arrange last minute plans. Ever noticed how last minute becomes 2+ weeks notice as you age and your commitments grow? Came home defeated, feeling trapped in a web of loneliness and grief. Snuggled with the kitties for 30 minutes or so desperately trying to figure out how to pull myself up by my boot-straps.
Then it hit me. Redefine how I view Friday nights. The kitties after days of little attention were thrilled to have me all to themselves. Remembering the decadence of not cooking, I decided to reclaim Friday dinner as my take-out splurge night. And to set the evening aside as my own free time to enjoy however I choose. My monthly chick-flick friday dates with my girlfriends, well it goes without saying, there is never a better choice!
In the end, I delighted myself by dusting off my attitude. And blissfully enjoyed spending an evening in with the kitties, Pagliacci delivered pizza/chocolate gelato and watched the M's come back in splendid fashion to beat the Detroit Tigers. A fabulous, relaxing start to the weekend.
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